{"id":287,"date":"2006-12-14T15:50:00","date_gmt":"2006-12-14T15:50:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/?p=287"},"modified":"2006-12-14T15:50:00","modified_gmt":"2006-12-14T15:50:00","slug":"old-prose","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/?p=287","title":{"rendered":"Old Prose"},"content":{"rendered":"

I wrote this piece for “The Fifth Column”, an underground paper that my brother and a friend of his were going to publish way back in the late 80s. No joke. I don’t think we ever put out an issue, but I wrote a lot of ridiculous pieces for it:<\/p>\n

\n

My Bike
by thugz(Worth)<\/p>\n

One day, a young man was riding along on his bicycle when he suddenly realized he had been riding the wrong way for at least 20 minutes.
“Oh no,” he thought. “What a serious bummer.”<\/p>\n

Thus, he quickly turned around and rode back for 20 minutes and realized that again, he had been going in the wrong direction.
“Fuck. I’ll just keep going this way.”<\/p>\n

So he did. And he rode on, for miles and miles.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wrote this piece for “The Fifth Column”, an underground paper that my brother and a friend of his were going to publish way back in the late 80s. No joke. I don’t think we ever put out an issue, but I wrote a lot of ridiculous pieces for it: My Bikeby thugz(Worth) One day, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-287","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/287","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=287"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/287\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=287"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=287"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.illinoir.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=287"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}